This morning, I was somehow drawn to a section of verses out of James 1. So, without over-thinking the reasons, or deciding to methodically read a section out of next month's DIW, I read, and re-read James 1:5-8.
"But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. For that man ought not to expect that he will receive anything from the Lord, being a double-minded man,unstable in all his ways."
So, with that read, I jotted down a few notes. 'What do I ask for from the Lord, and do I doubt when I ask? Well, I don't know that I've ever doubted His ability to do something, so much so as His willingness.' More than anything, my sin, and my knowledge of it gets in the way of my earnest requests to the Lord.
After all, why would He want to give those things that I ask for when I constantly cause Him pain?
Then, after reading it for a third time, I realized something... This section of Scripture isn't referring to just anything... It's a direct reference to wisdom. BIG difference between asking for something I want, and earnestly requesting those things that the Lord says He wants to give.
Then came another note... or more like a question: 'What kind of things does the Lord want to give? What are some things that He's already given?' Just like that, because of His grace, He began to remind me of all the things He gives or has given.
-Every spiritual blessing in the heavenlies (Eph. 1)
-His precious and magnificent promises (1 Pt. 1)
-Adoption as sons, and the ability to cry out "Abba! Father!" (Romans 8)
This list could go on forever... literally. He gives those things because He is good. Because He's a Shepherd, and knows His sheep and exactly what they need.
"Then He said to them, 'Suppose one of you has a friend, and goes to him at midnight and says to him, 'Friend, lend me three loaves; for a friend of mine has come to me from a journey, and I have nothing to set before him'; and from inside he answers and says, 'Do not bother me; the door has already been shut and my children and I are in bed; I cannot get up and give you anything.' 'I tell you, even though he will not get up and give him anything because he is his friend, yet because of his persistence he will get up and give him as much as he needs. 'So I say to you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives; and he who seeks, finds; and to him who knocks, it will be opened. Now suppose one of you fathers is asked by his son for a fish; he will not give him a snake instead of a fish, will he? Or if he is asked for an egg, he will not give him a scorpion, will he?'" (Luke 11: 5-12)
The notes continued. 'Psalm 37:4 causes some to ask the question- Why doesn't the Lord give me what I want? In times of uncertainty, immaturity, and confusion, I've asked the same question. But there's something that can be so easily missed... like, the first half of the verse: Delight yourself in the Lord. If I'm delighting myself in the Lord, and searching out His heart and His desires, then my prayers will be centered on those things that He wants instead of those things that my flesh wants.'
This search, or biblical adventure, if you will just keeps expanding. From this, I've been stimulated to reevaluate my prayer life, along with those things that I desire the most. What I "want" and what I ask for are a good indication of my relationship with the Lord. Am I "in tune" with His desires, or with the ones of my rotting, dying flesh?
I could keep going for pages, and pages... but that takes time away from the more important tasks at hand. For now, I'll ask for wisdom, and leave the giving of understanding in my Lord's strong and faithful hands.
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